Can I get some feedback on my second script please?

[burtreynolds]

This is only my second script and it’s 4x longer than my first one. I’m not entirely sure it’s ready for prime time just yet. I was just hoping to get some feedback on it before it’s released to the public. Made for the Handy.
Thanks in advance.

Richelle Ryan - Sexy pornstar sucking off amateur dudes in gloryhole.funscript (39.5 KB)

https://spankbang.com/1cc74/video/sexy+pornstar+sucking+off+amateur+dudes+in+gloryhole

Unfortunately I can’t remember how to make a preview gif.

UPDATE: I intensified the script slightly. Mostly hand action.
2nd draft - Richelle Ryan - Sexy pornstar sucking off amateur dudes in gloryhole.funscript (39.6 KB)

[mADsCRIPTS]

Maybe if I find some free time later, I will check out your script

[Slibowitz]

Honestly, you did an excellent job there and it’s a huge improvement over your first one. There is nothing I can say to improve in this one. Make sure to make it more intense, when hand and mouth are used together.

Very well done and I am looking forward to the next one

@burtreynolds

Unfortunately I can’t remember how to make a preview gif.

Check this tutorial

[Husky]

That’s your 2nd script? Wow, wish my second script was like this. Great job

[jacecolm]

General advice… Never forget that if you like the script, then you have done a good job.

[burtreynolds]

Hey thanks for the compliments and feedback. I was thinking that maybe I held back a little too much during some of the hand/mouth parts. I might go back and bump up some those strokes. Do you think I should exaggerate the strokes a bit at the last cumshot to give it a stronger finish?

I was looking for that exact tutorial! I don’t know why I was having such a hard time finding it. I should have just checked my bookmarks.

[burtreynolds]

@Husky

@Husky

That’s your 2nd script? Wow, wish my second script was like this.

Everyone gets lucky at some point.

@Husky

Great job

Thank you very much!

[burtreynolds]

@jacecolm

General advice… Never forget that if you like the script, then you have done a good job.

Thanks for the tip!
I think I had just been working on it for so long that I had started to become a little numb to it.

[burtreynolds]

@mADsCRIPTS

Maybe if I find some free time later, I will check out your script

If you do, I hope you enjoy it.
Did I not do my heat map right? I did it in HandyControl and I was really unsure about the best way to do it.

[Slibowitz]

@burtreynolds

Do you think I should exaggerate the strokes a bit at the last cumshot to give it a stronger finish?

Yes, I would. I personally like to exaggerate the strokes by a bit during the finish section.

@burtreynolds

Did I not do my heat map right? I did it in HandyControl and I was really unsure about the best way to do it.

Heatpmap is good, just bump up the height, so it’s better visible.

[mADsCRIPTS]

Very good 2nd script, i just checked it with scripting tool

[Princeslave]

The Script is Almost perfect, extremely accurate, and various, really a great job. The only thing that i can say to you is to insert in the script a little warm up time. it’s star a too fast at the beggin.

[burtreynolds]

Thank you! Thanks for taking the time to look at it.

[burtreynolds]

Good point and I’ll take another look at it. Thanks for the feedback and thanks for the compliment!