Need opinions on a script style for this video

I’m just gonna leave this here. I hope you don’t mind. The next episode is supposed to be on blowjobs and difficult situations such as this. There’s already some good Q and A in the comments on this topic though.
https://discuss.eroscripts.com/t/slibowitz-how-to-script-video-tutorial-series-episode-1-cowgirl-and-reverse-cowgirl/116607